In 2003, I read THE RULES by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider, a book I highly suggest for all young women (and men so you can learn how to act! lol). Although I don’t follow Rule #32 (see below*) to the T, that book was such an eye opener to my value, and what a waste of time it is going after guys. Remember, Rule #1: “You are a creature unlike any other.” When I started to believe this, a lot of things got clear. See, we girls tend to set our “targets” and then push and toil to get the guy, not ever living in the reality of whether or not it’s gunna happen from his end. The truth is that if he didn’t approach you first, initiate the date, or just call you vs. calling you back, you don’t really know if he’d be into you if you weren’t conveniently hanging around. (READ THAT LAST SENTENCE 3 MORE TIMES. Seriously.) Someone who’s really excited about you makes the effort, and you want a guy who’s really excited about you right?

Most people are somewhat considerate and their actions stem from reciprocation or even guilty obligation, so you never know unless you give them the space to sack up. That’s the difference between a man that loves you or is in love with you – and personally, the former without the latter isn’t a desirable romantic relationship. Guys who love you as a person get you office supplies for your birthday ’cause it’s practical. Guys who are IN LOVE with you get you flowers or sweet nothings just cause it’s Tuesday. See the difference?

***I’m not into playing games but I am into men being the male role in the area of courting.

That’s the part that sucks…

…cause seriously, “if I like you then I like you.” (and if you didn’t get that reference then you betta leave this page right NOW and download “Money Grubbin’” from iTunes. BTDubbs, who got the Lady Gaga reference with my blog title?) Ok wait. Re-focus… what I mean is it’s freakin’ hard to get over that rejected feeling if the one you set your sights on isn’t crazy about you.

Look, males are pretty easy. If they like you, they sure act like it. If they don’t, they don’t. Simple, not easy (as is life). Oh, and if they like you but are “too afraid to show it,” do you really want to spend your time with a guy that you’re going to constantly have to coach throughout the relationship? Give men the space to grow. That’s part of our duty as women.

You are a creature like any other! Believe it. Any guy who gets to have your heart should know how lucky he is to be chosen by a gem like you, and if he doesn’t, you simply say, “NEXT!”

xo!
Noreen

P.S. A little back story on me: Guys didn’t like me “like that” in high-school. Ever. I had one boyfriend, for like 2 months Junior Year. Nowadays it’s a different story I didn’t get it together until like 2004, lol, and it’s still a work in progress but I’m glad I learned these things sooner than later. You’re allowed to know how amazing you are! But please, always stay humble.

P.P.S *Rule #32: Don’t Break The Rules.